no regrets, just love.

Who are you?

Because I don’t know who this person is. This guy that pretends I’m nonexistent when we used to talk every single day. You used to know everything there was to know about me and I knew everything about you too. We trusted each other, loved seeing each other in class even when we pretended to hate it. Even when we couldn’t be together, we were best friends. We were happy. Now you can’t even look at me. What did I do to deserve this? You think this is okay, but it’s not. I have feelings and we have a past and you can’t pretend that none of that matters. How could you act like this when I’m pouring my heart out to you, when I miss you like crazy. I know underneath it all you miss me too, you wish things could go back to the way they were. Even if it’s a small part, I know you know what you’re doing is wrong. Who ever thought you were the type of guy to let your girlfriend dictate who you could be friends with? Have fun next year in college with that tight leash. How can you not see that she’s only temporary and I’m going to be there for you forever? I hope you see it soon. It kills me because I can’t be mad at you for this. I’m frustrated as hell but I can’t hate you. You’ll always be my best friend no matter what, and whenever you need me, I’ll be there for you. I guess it just sucks that right now you can’t see that. What can I do to make you see that?

something.

Something about you keeps me awake at night.

But the thing is, I don’t know if that’s a bad thing. It might be. Of course it’s not good, but I don’t know if it ever could be. That’s the problem. I guess I don’t know you well enough to judge whether or not this is going to work.

You say I’m pretty, but do you mean it? You say sorry, but do you mean it?

There’s something about you that makes me want to hear from you.  Do you want to hear from me? I know I hang on your every word. Do you even think about me? I hate feeling like this; normally I’m a good judge of character but with you I just never know. 

Even if I come to find this is bad, it’ll be too late. I’m in too deep now.

That something about you will keep me coming back for more. Always.

There’s a String

that can’t be cut or untied

trust me, I’ve tried.

It’s strategically fixed

on the left side of my chest,

so whenever it’s yanked on

my heart rattles, I lurch forward

without my body’s consent.

This string is miles long;

Even when I can’t see him

I know he’s twirling the frayed end

in his fingers, thinking about

giving it a tug just to make sure

he still has a sturdy grip.

Months and months go by,

and sometimes I forget the string’s presence.

There are no surprise jerks or heaves

and I believe he’s gotten tired

of playing with the string, with my heart.

Then I feel a familiar tautness.

I shut my eyes and shift my weight backward

with all my might, but his desire

to keep me in his palm

will never cease;

And I realize this twisted tug of war

will always be mine to lose.

And darling, just holding my hand’s enough

To get me, to get me through the silence

If this moment was all that I could have 

Well that’s just fine, I’m content

‘Cause you’re mine

I hope this turns into a song. or something… 
whycantIwritesongs.